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General discussionBad puns to brighten your day(30 posts)(30 posts)
(30 posts)
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This is my favourite topic
Posted April 13, 2020
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Mortius1: The pun is the worst form of humour. There is no vice-versa.
What do you call a dog that can do magic?

A Labracadabrador.
Posted April 13, 2020
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Talin_Warhaft: A Labracadabrador.
How do you call an Alaskan dog whose genes have been altered?

A Malamutant.
Posted April 13, 2020
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dtgreene: (This man page can be viewed on FreeBSD systems by typing "man tunefs" at the command prompt; this can also work on some other BSD-based systems, including at least older versions of Mac OS X.)
You shouldn't use such exclusionary language. This is offensive to those of us who are not men.
Posted April 13, 2020
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Talin_Warhaft: I'll go first. This one is stolen from Dragon Ball Z:

You can tune a guitar, but you can't Tuna fish.

Edit: I'm a dummy. Tienshinhan didn't say guitar, he said piano.
Well, actually that was the title of a REO Speedwagon album long before Dragon Ball Z...
Posted April 13, 2020
They are termed, "pipe dreams;" that is because they are ever destined to go "down the tubes."
Posted April 13, 2020
I had to change my back tires for the front ones today to balance out the tread. Until one got away from me I was having a wheely great time.

I was doing really great as a stand up comedian, though there were so many events i never ended up going to.

Hey i hear your like history jokes; pity all mine are so old.

Yolk it up folks 'cause these jokes are eggcellent.
Posted April 13, 2020
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dtgreene: (I read in a book that there's apparently a comment in the man page source that warns people not to remove this joke.)
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clarry: Here's the comment:

.\" Take this out and a Unix Demon will dog your steps from now until
.\" the time_t's wrap around.
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clarry: sauce:

http://cvsweb.openbsd.org/src/sbin/tunefs/tunefs.8?rev=1.27&content-type=text/x-cvsweb-markup
(For systems using 32-bit time_t, time_t's will wrap around in January of 2048; for systems using 64-bit time_t, this won't happen for over 250 billion years.)

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MaceyNeil: Yolk it up folks 'cause these jokes are eggcellent.
Are you sure you can take all the 'pun'-ishment?
Post edited April 13, 2020 by dtgreene
Posted April 13, 2020
Why did the dude adopt a dachshund? He heard the cowboy say, "Get along little doggy."
Posted April 13, 2020
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dtgreene: (This man page can be viewed on FreeBSD systems by typing "man tunefs" at the command prompt; this can also work on some other BSD-based systems, including at least older versions of Mac OS X.)
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Starmaker: You shouldn't use such exclusionary language. This is offensive to those of us who are not men.
Why is it that I frequently hear about mandates but never womandates?

Might and Magic VI: The Womandate of Heaven could've been such an interesting title..
Post edited April 13, 2020 by clarry
Posted April 13, 2020
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Starmaker: You shouldn't use such exclusionary language. This is offensive to those of us who are not men.
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clarry: Why is it that I frequently hear about mandates but never womandates?

Might and Magic VI: The Womandate of Heaven could've been such an interesting title..
Clearly we must live in progressive times when it is neccessary to distinguish the person who delivers my letters as a 'male- man'. :P
Posted April 13, 2020
Again, we went from bad puns to bad/corny jokes to bad taste, and soon we have ourselves a new non sequitur thread. Good tact and form I think.

Why play on the piano when you can play with the pianist?

Never take others tongue out, it might dry-freeze.
Posted April 15, 2020
Is Lee Knott a father?

A parent... Lee Knott.
Posted April 16, 2020
What's a pirate's favourite letter? You'd think it's r, but it's actually the c!
Posted April 16, 2020
I want more puncakes.
Posted April 16, 2020
What did the fire chief name his two sons?

Hose A (José), and Hose B.
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This is my favourite topic
Community
General discussionBad puns to brighten your day(30 posts)(30 posts)
(30 posts)