Banned for horribly misspelling his name.

Banned because that's the worst pick up line I ever heard.

Banned for thinking there's such a thing as good pick-up lines.

Banned because I only get put-down lines.

^ banned, because I'm picking up what you're putting down

Banned for collecting and hoarding other people's discarded items.

^ banned because anthropology is a bit more than what you described

Banned because I prefer to study misanthropy... so shut up, idiot.

^ banned for missing Miss Aunt Throp's pecan pie last Yule

Banned for running over a drainage pipe that was just sitting out in the middle of the road and causing it to roll and bounce behind you. Then when somebody driving the opposite direction stopped so I could run out and grab it, I thought "Oh good, it's just like with that shoe after breakfast last Saturday!" but I didn't look well enough at both lanes in my path and a red truck swerved to avoid me. Another driver stopped when I got the first of 3 pipe segments on the curb and before I noticed the other 2 still on the road to ask if I was ok. I was more forgiving of the red truck than she was because he couldn't have expected somebody to run out in the street to grab an object he didn't see. After the concerned driver left, traffic was completely clear so I could remove the remaining pipe safely.

^ Banned for not being able to surpass old Auntie Norris, the 1951 Berksbury champion of waffling and nattering.

Banned for burying Burks under waffles with Chuck Norris's wife.

^ banned for not explaining what Chuck Norris' wife was doing under waffles

Banned for never knowing the joys of waffles as bed sheets.

Banned for baking a delicious looking pie that just contained a series of smaller pies, like a Russian Doll, with no actual filling.

^ banned for being one of the "upper crust"